Posts Tagged ‘Stars Behind Bars’

Top Chef Season 2 runner-up Marcel “Giant Head/Bigger Ego” Vigneron was arrested and thrown in the clink on Saturday for a DUI.

Marcel posted the $2,500 bail and even managed to make it to a benefit event on Sunday.

Keep your nose out of the cooking sherry little buddy.

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Stars Behind Bars: 3 Hour Tour Edition

Dawn Wells, better known as Mary-Anne from Gilligan’s Island, was caught with marijuana in her car after being pulled over for erratic driving.

I didn’t know she had it in her. Turns out she probably didn’t.

A friend of hers claims it was his pot in the backseat and Wells told the cops she was swerving trying to find the heat/AC controls in her new car.

Despite her pretty solid story, Wells pleaded guilty to the reckless driving charge. The judge sentenced her to 5 days in jail, a $40o+ fine and six months of probation.

If this had been 40 years ago, she probably would’ve gotten out of the whole thing by signing a few autographs or flashing the officer. To be an aging sex symbol…single tear.

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Thank DListed for this gem:

Matt Roloff was acquitted of drunk driving today.

He said the adjustments on his wife’s pedal extensions caused him to swerve. The man can drive a tractor, a bobcat, and other giant farm and stone equipment but a little change to the pedal extension and he can’t operate a minivan anymore?


Either way, he’s off the hook.

I can’t wait to see how TLC edits this to make it look like the most dramatic and harrowing court case of all time. Move over To Kill A Mockingbird.

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He’s out on $11,000 bail but Tim “Youngblood” Chapman, the ponytailed, skinny BFF of Dog The Bounty Hunter was arrested on Thursday. This story is for the ages…or the Enquirer.

Apparently Chapman was sitting in the cab of his pick-up truck with his pants down. The truck was parked outside a local shopping center and concerned citizens called the police because they thought he was fondling himself in public. When the cops showed up, Chapman went apeshit! Instead of getting out the car like they demanded, he slid into the driver’s seat, hit the gas, jumped the curb and almost hit a security guard.

Chapman was originally arrested with suspicion of second-degree attempted murder. But according to the Honolulu Star-Bulletin, he now faces a charge of first-degree terroristic threatening and the prosecuters may add indecent exposure.

The best part? Chapman says he wasn’t jerking off at all, he had just spilled juice on his pants. That’s rich.

All I can do is laugh and smile at just how fast that family fell apart. Sorry Dog. It’s just not your day, your life even.

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Stars Behind Bars: The OC Edition

Mischa Barton spent a night in jail after getting arrested for suspicion of drunk driving. She should have been arrested for having a ton of money and awful hair. Or bad acting choices. Lock her up and throw away the key.

My guess? She made a grand escape and slipped through the bars.

When I start my website, pleaseeatasandwich.com, she’s going to be on the homepage.

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Stars Behind Bars: Topanga Edition

Danielle Fishel, (girl-geek and awkward wife), Topanga on Boy Meets World , was arrested this morning on a drunk driving warrant.

Let’s think of all the reasons Topanga would have to be drinking and driving:

  • Former flame Lance Bass is no longer interested.
  • Boy Meets World re-runs are hard to find now, even on Disney.
  • She’s a correspondent to the Tyra show, which is a punishment in and of itself
  • Other than BMW, the only remarkable thing on her acting resume is an episode of Yes, Dear

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Stars Behind Bars: Lane Garrison

Remember Tweener (Lane Garrison, pictured) from seasons 1 and 2 of Prison Break? Well awhile back he drove drunk, crashed and killed his 17-year-old passenger. He was just sentenced to just over three years in prison.

This guy should be in prison. Someone died. Lock him up. But for some reason, I can’t help feeling sad for him. If he is still as baby-faced as he was on the show, things are going to be very hard for him. I also think about the lady-celebs who mishandle their money and do drugs, endanger their children and flash their lady parts all around town. Grnated they haven’t killed anyone, but it’s only a matter of time.

I support a moratorium on movies, parties, TV shows and new music for awhile. Everyone just stay home. Find yourself. Stay out of the limelight and out of trouble. And if you’re going to drink, get a frickin’ cab.

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