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Posts Tagged ‘News’

No Deal

George W. Bush taped a greeting that will air during tomorrow night’s ep of Deal or No Deal?

I think the best part of being a lame-duck president would be taking advantage of the perks of the office but getting out of all of the work. It would be like that movie Dave.

If NBC thought this through, they’d ask the President to do a guest spot on Friday Night Lights instead. It could really use the temporary increase in eyeballs. Plus it’s about Texas and football. He’d fit right in.

But that’s just how I’d do it.
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This Week In Idol Chatter

A mother in Indianapolis was so wrapped up in last week’s American Idol results show that she left her two young daughters alone in the bathtub where one almost drowned.

Sheila Brooks was watching the episode with her oldest daughters, ages 7 and 5 while her younger girls, ages 3 and 1 were in the tub. The results, (which weren’t even shocking to most people) must have greatly captivated Brooks because she forgot her young daughters were in the bath unattended. When she realized her error, she didn’t run in to check on the girls herself, instead she sent the 7-year-old in to do a spot check. When the young girl noticed her sister submerged in the water, she called for help. Luckily Mom was willing to tear herself away long enough to do get her daughter to the hospital.

Luckily the 3-year-old is okay and in protective custody with the rest of her sisters. Brooks hasn’t been charged with anything yet, but between the neglect and marijuana paraphernalia police found in her home, she won’t be scott free for long. At least they get Fox in jail.

Found in Indianapolis Star via Reality Blurred.

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Super Tuesday Showdown


My state didn’t vote today but I still enjoy watching the returns from today’s Super Tuesday elections. More than the data, stats, numbers, etc are the gimmicks, glossy hair cuts and power ties. Indeed, I just like watching the coverage for coverage sake. Let’s break it down.

I’m devoting a few minutes to all of the major news nets and then doing a side by side comparison. Click the image to enlarge.

The victor tonight? ABC News. Who knew Diane, George and Charlie made such a great team? I guess everyone who loved Good Morning America 5 years ago.

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But What Will Become of Local On The 8s?

The Weather Channel is up for sale, at an auction no less. According to the New York Times, the network may for $5 Billion and is being looked at by the likes of NBC and Comcast.

How much would I pay for The Weather Channel? A whole lot of nothing. Whenever I put it on, it is a commercial and usually for something awkward like Cialis, AARP or The Scooter Store. If they really want to cater to old people, they’d show things like this:

Attention Weather Channel: I am not 75, I just want to know whether it’s cold enough to warrant a long-sleeve tee.

It’s no wonder you’re going under. Sheesh.

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Huck and Leno Are Probably Besties Now


Mike Huckabee is the projected Republican winner in the Iowa caucuses tonight. I would like to think his victory is due to Chuck Norris, his strapping Tudors-inspired haircut (above) and his appearance on Leno last night.

It was the first night back for late-night talk show hosts and while Letterman boasted funny man Robin Williams, Leno came out strong with Huckabee. According to the early ratings, Leno took the numbers last night.

So who helped who more? Did his appearance on Leno help Huck to the top or vice-versa?

And more importantly: I watched CNN’s coverage of the caucuses tonight and more impressive than Wolf Blitzer’s blinding metallic tie was Anderson Cooper’s pie chart board. He held up what looked like a piece of cardboard and a hologram of a pie chart appeared on it. Then, instead of listening to the political commentators, all I could do was watch Anderson fiddle with the board, making the graph smaller and bigger. He was like a kid with a bubble wand. It was mesmerizing.

And kudos to Barack Obama for winning the caucus for the Dems. Way to Barack The Vote Iowa!

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New Years Eve Specials: Yikes!


I’m headed out of town tonight and while I’m bringing along my computer, things will get hectic. And by things I mean me, and by hectic I mean drunk.

I have to finish packing but I owe you this much. Nothing to do on New Years? Here is a handy guide from USA Today on where to find your favorite C-List celebrities doing countdown specials.

If it were up to me, we’d all ring in the New Year watching U Party With Fox News. I don’t know who’s going to have a worse evening; the people tuning in to play interactive news games with Griff Jenkins or Griff Jenkins. Six in one hand, half-dozen in the other.

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Vicious Cycle

When the news of former Pakistani PM Benazir Bhutto’s assassination hit the US news cycle, I was in the middle of a non-stop block of 30 Rock on DVD.

In fact, I didn’t learn of her tragic death for three hours. My excuse? A slow day at the house and a play all feature.

Once I heard about the news, I was dumbfounded. By the senseless act of violence and hate, and how I’d been too wrapped up in my own mess, my comedy, my DVD, my morning.

There are people across the country, too many, who have no idea what happened today. Most were probably watching TV or movies, just two clicks away from the internet, steps away from a newspaper or a friend.

What’s my point? I’m getting there, I swear. We’re given everything when we want it. We have so many options that we can see what we want and skip what we don’t. I enjoy avoiding the commercials on my Tivo, or with DVDs and I can argue that I’m not missing much. But by ducking those chance encounters, I’m really missing…a lot.

People move faster, technology catchs up with them and the cycle continues. Violence tears families apart, the Earth melts away, people are eating too much. The cycles feed into each other and both of them are messing us up. But how do you change that? Does anyone really want it to change? Or is it just something nice to think about?

I just don’t know where to start.

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