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Archive for February, 2011

She liked this one. I much preferred hers.

When you’re right, you’re right.

“Everybody knows I’m a motherfuckin’ Mormon.”

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Sweater Vest to the Rescue

So we’ve been through a few episodes of SKINS: America  since our last g-chat convo post. There are many reasons for this. Mostly, the show has been a buzz kill and I’m not happy about it. However, being such a loyal fan of the original and also being super into teen angst lately, I’ve decided to stick with it and my blogging partner is standing by my side. So here it is, folks:

Slamwich: Five minutes! Ready the witticisms!

Ediddy: haha. we’re literally gonna watch it LIVE

Slamwich: Can I get a what-what for technology?

Ediddy: raising my roofs

Slamwich: I’m watching the tail end of Jersey Shore on mute. I hate how much these kids get paid? Why did I go to college?

Ediddy: haha, theyre gross. ALL RIGHT

Slamwich: Yay! I hope Sweater Vest doesn’t ruin everything

Ediddy: all we have is hope

Slamwich: LOL

Slamwich: In the previously on skins, I hear lines from the other episodes that I totally missed.

Ediddy: haha, yea… the plot all of sudden makes sense?

Slamwich: The episodes look better

Ediddy: haha yes, so far good

Slamwich: someone described the kids on this show as looking malnourished

Ediddy: daisys boobs make another appearance

Slamwich: They should win best supporting actress in a drama

Ediddy: hahaha

Slamwich: Wouldn’t they give him his clothes back?

Ediddy: we’ve maxed out on silliness

Slamwich: What kind of Canada is this?

Ediddy: hahaha

Slamwich: So everyone likes Tea right? Is there anyone on the show that doesn’t?

Ediddy: hahah

Slamwich: FURIOUS TONY IS FURIOUS!

Ediddy: yea she gets around, shes very likable

Slamwich: And I continue to hate every adult on this show

Ediddy: yea. im loving the weed butt conversation

Slamwich: It’s nice to be reminded that they are in fact high school boys

Ediddy: right, yea

Ediddy: and we’re back!

Slamwich: Who is this asshole? People like this don’t exist in real life.

Ediddy: yea this is dumb. again

Slamwich: They could save this right now if one of the kids got killed by a moose

Ediddy: hahahahahah a whole new turn for SKINS: America

Slamwich: Daisy knows a lot about bears. And why shouldn’t she? That’s logical for a 16 year old girl from Baltimore

Ediddy: hahaha

Slamwich: Is that Betty? Was her name Betty? She’s in the class?

Ediddy: yea, shes been in a few eps, im glad they didnt drop her

Slamwich: Me too. I hope she gets to talk.

Ediddy: im sure tea will bone some boys before she and betty bone again though

Slamwich: As long as it’s not Tony again. Too much.

Ediddy: oh chris and his ghetto speak

Slamwich: That fade is the most accurate thing on this show

Ediddy: HA. the girls are good. the boys are bad.

Slamwich: It should be the girls and Chris. He can stay.Yes! Betty! Well that was brief

Ediddy: hahahaha. that was great. more stuff like that and im back on the skins bus

Slamwich: Exactly. Maybe Sweater Vest’s episode can save this after all

Ediddy: OMG THERE IS A LOVE CALCULATOR COMEDIDDYRCIAL

Slamwich: And did Tea really need to bring her leather jacket to the woods?

Ediddy: haha, im sorry but i love tea’s style. i dig it

Slamwich: To the woods though? The woods? I am too busy dressing for the weather I suppose.

Ediddy: haha yea, well they didnt expect that. thats how she gets betty. that and her northern soul

Slamwich: Touche.

Ediddy: WADE IN THE WATER IN HER LEATHER

Slamwich: Jazzed up negro spirituals have that affect on people. The water would ruin the weather!

Ediddy: haha omg. the teacher and chris have chemistry

Slamwich: Which is a little creepy. The only time it wasn’t: Ms. Jacobs and Pacey on Dawson’s Creek.

Ediddy: ha and aria and her teach on pretty little liars

Slamwich: I think it’s weird because somehow he seems more together than she does

Ediddy: great song. oh god. tony sucks

Slamwich: Great for summertime. I see why they picked it. The Music Supervisor is doing a great job.

Ediddy: ya he’s good

Slamwich: Oooh are they blending season 1 and season 3? Please let someone get hit with a rock!

Ediddy: haah the mushroom talk. Hahahah. then have sex. rock murder sex

Slamwich: We are saving the show with these innovations

Ediddy: it’s like tony is reading the script, like literally holding it and reading it. lick a toad. haha gross

Slamwich: YES! This is like that scene in sandlot.

Ediddy: that was an exorcist moment for stanley

Slamwich: This episode just took a turn for the better. Slapping, vomit, naked teachers.

Ediddy: haha. always a plus

Slamwich: Now we need someone to get injured, then rock murder sex

Ediddy: perfect. they should also play a florence and the machine song during it all

Slamwich: Yes! Cosmic Love

Ediddy: uh oh night time. sex time

Slamwich: They all use each other for sex and drugs. My friends and I used to drink smirnoff ice in the basement and play scattergories.

Ediddy: hahahaha

Slamwich: Who was that sleeping? Solved.

Ediddy: haha yea

Slamwich: Who kicks Betty out of bed?

Ediddy: haha. tea is confused. i like it. shes interesting

Slamwich: She’s got a little complexity. I like that she frustrates me. Everyone else just annoys me.

Ediddy: right

Slamwich: God I hope there’s a murderer in the woods

Ediddy: i think she’s the most realistic teenage character

Slamwich: I laughed a lot harder than I thought I would at that “mount my pole” joke

Ediddy: HAHAHA. Yea. we’ve seen daves package wayyy too many times this episode

Slamwich: Way too many times. Yikes City.

Ediddy: ya i feel like tony is stalking tea.

Slamwich: He seems a bit obsessed.

Ediddy: really that was silly

Slamwich: They had a great opportunity there to shift a few things…and then nothing happened.

Slamwich: Tuck that one away, “What you want isn’t how I’m built.” She’s also a robot

Ediddy: hahahahaha. at least they gave that some sort of resolution. i was already sick of him liking her and it’s only been this episode

Slamwich: 45 minutes too long

Ediddy: oy. tanley is still pooping?

Slamwich: Also 45 minutes too long

Ediddy: bahahaha. the weed fist bump. these kids ONLY care about drugs

like it’s the only thing that they actually care about

Slamwich: It’s the way addicts are

Ediddy: all the teens are addicts

Slamwich: And malnourished.

Ediddy: haha

Slamwich: I wish MTV could’ve just aired the UK one. Even censored it would be better.

Ediddy: ya. or maybe if they approached it differntly? BEAR GAYS. yessss

Slamwich: Canadian Bear Gays! And Rangers!

Ediddy: murder rock sex time

Slamwich: The main event!

Ediddy: i always hide under tarps in mysterious vans

Slamwich: Duh! All smart kids do. Oh hell no!

Ediddy: ugh. Well that happened

Slamwich: I hate Tony. And it was too dark to see anything leading up to that.

Ediddy: sweater vest is good in this scene

Slamwich: OH SHIT That’s what I yelled at the TV

Ediddy: he should be dead

Slamwich: For sure. Yeah that was a good scene. Didn’t need it to be resolved like this.

Ediddy: ugh. that was weird

Slamwich: How many people have to be seriously injured before they cancel this trip?

Ediddy: hahaha… screaming tea really? well some of that was good

Slamwich: That would’ve been way better if he screamed from the top of the ropes course. Better than most

Ediddy: yea- better than the other ones for sure. i never feel like much is accomplished

Slamwich: Because whenever they get close to accomplishing something they cut to soemthing stupid

Ediddy: yep

Ediddy: b for msic?

Slamwich: B for the t-shirts. I want one. C for Abbud on the platform. F for Tony. A for the promo for next week.

Ediddy: haha yea. i agree. nicely done

Slamwich: Thanks. I would also like to give an A to the East Coast feed.

Ediddy: haha agreed

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I hate how much I love Top Shot.

The guns. The bravado. The ignorance. The accents. The exploding household goods.

And Colby. Oh Colby, you’ve come a long way since Survivor.

Haven’t seen the show? It’s a reality competition show to find the best marksman. I’m embarrassed that I know this.

“God didn’t create all men equal. Smith & Wesson did.” A contestant just said that.

I’m going to go die of shame.

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Big Love – Really

Honestly one of the finest Big Love blog entries of all time.

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Goodbye Uncle Leo

Len Lesser, better known as Uncle Leo on Seinfeld, passed away this morning.

Lesser’s career spanned 60 years and included television roles on ER, thirtysomething, and Everybody Loves Raymond.

You’ll be missed Len. Here’s one of my favorite Leo moments.

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It’s 66 degrees in February.

My home state is crumbling under the weight of an ignorant governor.

A CBS News Correspondent was brutally assaulted last week in Cairo.

And then this?

Make the world go away.

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…at least the East Coast feed. Sorry West Coasters, I’m sure you had some great jokes too.

On Jennifer Hudson, Christina Aguilera and the Aretha Franklin tribute.

Train won an Emmy for “Hey Soul Sister.” (I know, right?) Kanye mentioned that one of the guys from train looks like Howie Mandel. It set off a head nod across the internet and “Howie Mandel” was trending within minutes.

The show continued. Lady Gaga’s performance was surprisingly demure. Her outfit and entrance were not.

We sifted through some country performances and a so-so rock show from Muse. Then Lenny Kravitz came. Needless to say, we were surprised to see him. You can do better Grammys. Way, way better.

Then I don’t remember who came next, Cee Lo or Katy Perry. We’ll say it was Cee Lo. He performed “Fuck You” with Gwyneth Paltrow and what appeared to be the cast of Fraggle Rock. I cried fuzzy tears of joy.

Katy Perry performed too. She was on a giant swing and then she danced with some candy hearts. The best part of her performance was actually when Nicole Kidman started singing along and proved to the entire world that her face moves.

Then we hit kind of a slow patch. No one made good jokes for awhile. But this was altogether true.

Some more awards went by. Then relatively unknown jazz singer, Esperanza Spalding,  beat out Justin Bieber and Florence + The Machine for Best New Artist.

Touche.

The awards and performances kept coming, then we saw a touching tribute to all the musicians who died. Boy there were a lot of them. Then, due to some awful timing Mick Jagger took the stage.

We continued. Eminem won an award. Diddy came out to introduce Drake and Rihanna. He was a little…sparkly.

Rihanna and Drake took the stage. Their  set was a bit…primitive.

The Tribe has spoken: Rihanna was workin’ that leotard.

Then Lady Antebellum won their 3rd award of the night. How long has that album been out? They performed Need You Now on last year’s Grammys. How is this right? #angryface

Arcade Fire performed and gave everyone a seizure that hurt so good. Though if you don’t listen to Arcade Fire you probably hated it.

But then they gave all the haters a big “Fuck You” by winning Album of the Year a few minutes later…and performing another song. Unprecedented much? They did a very happy version of “Ready To Start.”

Yes, yes they are. Get the album jerks. It’s amazing.

And that’s it from the Grammys. Did your favorite artists win? I’m looking forward to next year. Get ready for Adele noms…and hopefully Kanye speeches.

Update: Arcade Fire had this to say:

 

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